WHATTUP.
Sup y'all. Let's keep this short&sweet.
I go by the name of Shivani, but people call me Shiv.
My day is 06/07 & I'm turning 14.
I'm in love with Tom Felton.
Laughing is my Passion
Yeah, that's about it.

ShoutMix chat widget

Amanda Yau
Angell Zang
Audrey Kim
Carissa Yu
Christine Luo
Grace Woo
Isobel Andrews
Jane Hu
Marcella Lau
Michelle Luk
Nadia Koeferl
Rachel Wang
Rebecca Chu

Template by Elle @ satellit-e.bs.com
Banners: reviviscent
Others: (1 | 2)

Watching the Royal Wedding ;

Bro: "They only invited fags."
Tish:"It's a wonder why they didn't invite YOU"
Me:"Oooooh, burn!"

I knew there was a reason I liked Tish (:

I felt closer to you. I felt happier. I read that and I realised I mean nothing to you. It ruined my day.
You just use me. Like a fucking tissue.
I blame myself for thinking you had changed. I can't believe I let myself trust you. I'm just someone that you talk to when you need to. I didn't realise that it hurt so much, I actually thought I meant something to you. I now remember why I don't tell you anything anymore. I wasn't sure if I should trust you, but I was beginning to think that I could. I now know that I can't.

I hate being used. I'm sick of it.

Not just you. Everybody.

That was the day it all started. The marks. The depression. To some it was a complete overreaction, but none of you have any idea what went through my mind. And lately, I don't know why, but that day keeps replaying in my head. I close my eyes and I can see it. I open my eyes and I remember it. It's as if it's haunting me.

03.08.10

i.want.to.be.normal.

I also like Big Time Rush.

iCarly is a great show too (:

Oh Freddie (:

I'm really into Victoria Justice at the moment. (:


Tell Me That You Love Me


This is just one of her songs. I like the show she's in as well. it's called Victorious. It comes on Nickelodeon.

I'm also going to do a HIMYM challenge. Either after or while I'm doing the GG challenge


Day 1- Favorite episode
Day 2- Best HIMYM moment/scene
Day 3- Favorite main character
Day 4- Favorite Lilipad/Marshmallow moment
Day 5- Favorite Robin Sparkles song
Day 6- Write a letter to Ted
Day 7- Favorite HIMYM holiday get together
Day 8- Favorite guest character
Day 9- Best group photo
Day 10- Write a letter to Marshall
Day 11- Least favorite/most annoying guest character
Day 12- Best high-five moment
Day 13- Least favorite main character
Day 14- Favorite HIMYM tradition
Day 15- Favorite life lesson (nothing good happens after 2am etc)
Day 16- Favorite “mother” moment (the yellow umbrella, foot, etc)
Day 17- Write a letter to Barney
Day 18- Best slap
Day 19- Suit up or suit down?
Day 20- Best Robin/Ted moment
Day 21- Favorite HIMYM actor or actress
Day 22- Write a letter to Lily
Day 23- Worst HIMYM moment
Day 24- Best Barney suit quote
Day 25- HIMYM tradition you’d like to follow in your own life
Day 26- Character you most relate to
Day 27- Saddest HIMYM moment
Day 28- Write a letter to Robin
Day 29- Funniest HIMYM scene
Day 30- Favorite Barney quote

"Do you really want your friends to know you whored yourself out to me?"
"You wouldn't." Her voice was laced with malice.
"Try me." He growled.

Just a random thing that was in my dream. I remembered it. I reckon it sounds cool. :)

HIDEEHOO

Okay, gosh. Most boring, yet kind of interesting holidays ever. :L

So yesterday? I think ... :L I went shopping and I got these amazing brown boots. OMGOMGOMG -spazz- HEHE :D And, I got these 3/4 Khaki pants, black I think they were.
Yeah, went window shopping. I love to window shop with my awesome friend :P hehe
Saw some awesome jewelrey that I plan to show my mother when we go shopping together.

Lalalalaa, should start to save up. Wanna buy some nice winter clothes before it gets too cold :/
I need more shoes.
I want another hoodie. I have like 3? maybe 4 hoodies. In white 8) I think i have like 2 pink hoodies, 1 purply-white one (which is like so old, so I can only wear it at home) & a blue one :D
Hmmm, thinking if I should get stockings for school ... Maybe. I hate stockings.

EHEHEHEHE, bought our supply of Easter Eggs 8) I got myself a Chocolate Bunny. HEHE, I like woolworths (:

Jo's going to let me borrow City of Bones by Cassandra Clare. Apparently it's good, so I want to read it (:
Meg Cabot is awesome (: I'm reading her book called, How To Be Popular and it's quite good.

I'm seriously in love with HIMYM & GG.
Two greatest shows ever.
HIMYM; Robin is so pretty in season 6 :) & Barney is so sweet with Nora? I think. Lily & Marshall are the awesome-est. And Ted ... well, Ted is Ted. :L
GG; Aish, Serena van der Woodsen is awesome, I love her (: My favourite pairing in GG would have to be, Rufus & Lily AND Chuck & Blair. They're like made for each other.

Anyway, I've seriously been sleeping at like 2-3 every night these holidays. I'm a bad kid. Re-watching GG at night time. Or on the internet on my phone reading FF.

Surprisingly, I've been studying these holidays too. I'm quite proud of myself. I'm starting tutor on Tuesday nights. I think I'm starting from Tuesday the 26th of April. Tutored for maths I think. I'm actually looking forward to tutor. :)

Tomorrow, I'm going to the airport to pick up Tish & Karan from their trip to America and Fiji. I like going to the arrivals at the airport. It makes me happy. I like planes. Speaking of planes, I want to go on a private jet. I really do. I just want to be so rich, that I can just fly away to my own private island when my life is getting tough. And just stay there. And cool off. Just a fantasy though. And, it's most likely going to stay a fantasy.


Okay so now, I'm going to do a GG Challenge. (probably won't go day-by-day, might do like a few in one day)
day 01 - your favourite character
day 02 - your least favourite character
day 03 - your favourite episode
day 04 - your least favourite episode
day 05 - your favourite guest-star
day 06 - your least favourite guest-star
day 07 - your favourite scene
day 08 - an episode you’ve seen more than once (or twice…)
day 09 - your favourite gossip girl quote
day 10 - your otp (one true pairing)
day 11 - your favourite funny scene
day 12 - a scene that makes you sad/cry
day 13 - a scene that makes you angry
day 14 - favourite male character
day 15 - favourite female character
day 16 - your favourite gossip girl friendship
day 17 - your favourite kiss
day 18 - a pairing you can’t stand
day 19 - something you wish had never happened
day 20 - your favourite omfg moment
day 21 - your favourite gossip girl song
day 22 - your favourite crack ship (ie, blair/dan, serena/chuck, blair/serena)
day 23 - most annoying character
day 24 - your favourite blair one-liner
day 25 - the character that is most like you
day 26 - your favourite on set picture
day 27 - your favourite cast picture
day 28 - your favourite gossip girl outfit
day 29 - your favourite season
day 30 - anything gossip girl related

Day 1 - Your Favourite Character
-Rufus Humphrey

Day 2 - Your Least Favourite Character
-Jack Bass

Day 3 - Your Favourite Episode (so far)
-How is it possible to have a favourite episode. They are all so good.

Day 4 - Your Least Favourite Episode
-Episode 19, Season 2 ; The Grandfather

Day 5 - Your Favourite Guest Star
-Tyra Banks who played Ursula Nyquist. Oh she was awesome.

Day 6 - Your Least Favourite Guest Star
-Joanna Garcia as Bree Buckley

Day 7 - Your Favourite Scene
-Episode 25, Season 2 ; When Chuck tells Blair he loves her. <3

Day 8 - An episode You Have Seen More Than Once ?(Or Twice)
-All of season 1 & 2


I think I'll stop there.

TTFN

I know it was wrong for me to blow up like that and say that. And, I really am sorry. I just got frustrated that you were trying to make yourself believe that. I was trying to make you understand that if you lied to yourself, it would hurt you even more in the long run.


But, that does not excuse what I said. I shouldn't have said anything, and you definitely wouldn't have lost any of my respect, I only said that out of pure frustration.


You're my friend, and it's my job to stick by you, not blow up at you and become so rude. After everything you have done for me in just the past week, I said that to you. You have no idea how much I regret it. I feel like the worst friend ever.


All day I've been drowning in a pool of guilt for saying that to you. I feel terrible. I truly am sorry.

I hope you forgive me x

I'm going to do this, & I'll start today.


1. What is one thing you would want to say to one person before you died?

Well, I believe I would tell the person to tell my dearest & closest friends that I loved them. But, to tell the truth, I have never really thought about that before. Maybe, if you ask me in a few years I might be able to answer it properly.

I have never been this afraid of being in the presence of him. Of being in the same room as him. It scares me far too much. I'm worried that he'll hurt me. Deep down, I know he won't. But, the worry is still there. It's all there. I look at him and I want to cry.

I can't stop pretending.

Thankyou to my friends for supporting me through this. It means a lot to me. More than you think. just the feeling of knowing that someone is there, it makes me feel safe. Those three posts, all brought a smile to my face. Not a fake smile, a real one. So thank you :)

I was talking to you today, it seemed I was completely fine. It's all part of my facade. It's all a lie.

The reason I find it hard to unload my thoughts lately, is because I feel like I'm always whining about something. I'm scared that all of you will get sick of me. I'm afraid that you'll all leave me. I'm just scared.

My walls are slowly crumbling around me. Slowly, but steadily.

I haven't done anything idiotic or stupid. But, I make no promises. I can no longer make promises. I'm too scared I'll break them.

My subconcious will never let me believe what I want to. It keeps nagging me & telling me that no one cares. I know it's not true, but sometimes I believe it. And a tiny part of me dies.

I need to leave this house for a day to see my friends. I need to forget things and be the other me. The happy me. The fun me.

I'm changing.

It's only been one weekend. I need to see you both again. I do. I need to talk to someone about this. Not just through MSN or texting. I need both of you. You both understand me. I hope you know who you two are.

Please don't betray my trust. I need to know that you two will always be here for me. As I will for you two.

I would be in hell without you people.

Thank you.

This is my 100th post.
Big woopteedo. Whatever.
Life is stupid.

Bye.

Well, I didn't have time to post yesterday, abdout yesterday .... Does that make sense?
So, yesterday was the bludgiest day ever.

First Period- I had IST, in which I did no work. All i did was watch HIMYM. God, I love that show.Oh & we don't have Podger for the rest of the term, 'cause she's getting married. We have Miss/Mrs/Ms Yasaratne. I think that's how you spell her name. She's awesome & she's my supposed ex-aunt. :L

Recess was hilarious. Poor Rea, :D

Second Period- We had History, with the coolest teacher ever. Miss White? I think it was. Oh she was awesome :) That was an extremely funny lesson and yes, karma is a bitch. And pridery is now officially a word. Hmph.

Thrid Period- Science? I think. That was an interesting lesson. Until I found out somethign about Jane, I rather would have not liked to know. But, you know. Whatever. :L Still, it was a pretty good lesson. Had a sub for science too. I think we has Miss/Mrs/Ms Smyth. Not sure though ...

Yeah, I had subs for the first three periods of my day. HOW AWESOME IS THAT.
Anyway, back to whatever I was talking about before.

Lunch was funny. Dimples make my group laugh & go all squealy. We have the awesomest group ever. And Rea, is going to have to endure my teasing about a certain B.C hehehehehheheh :P

Last Period- We had Commerce. That was an awesome lesson. Sitting in the Library Annex & having telepathic conversations with Vidushi. God, we're awesome :D Isobel & her stories make me laugh :)

So, train. Darn me & Rebecca couldn't spot him, but maybe next week. :D
Epping, damnit, he wasn't there D: But, no matters, maybe next week. :)
And, I swear to god Rebecca, if you keep hitting me I am going to bruise so badly that I will cry in pain == I don't even do anything .... much :P

Bus, was weird. I'm very educated in the K-pop area as now Rachel & Margaret both now know. :D BOOYAH :P heh

Yup, that was my day. Oh & when i got home, I found out we were going out to a friends place. I love those guys. They're like the brothers I wished I had. Or wished mine were like. :L Anyway, played poker. I didn't do very well. :L & played NBA on the playstation 3. That was extremely fun HEHE :D

I love Tish's mother. She is awesome. (:

NTS:
History Assesment
Science Powerpoint
Commerce Assignment

Aish, I am so screwed.

Gotta go and get started. D:
Cya!